Final day of chemo.

When I express how excited I am that this is my final day of chemo, I get looks from the MDs and ARNPs, etc, like "You do know that this is just a start to much of the discomfort...don't you." I just say, yeah, yeah, that 's what I've heard, but why think about that now. They go on to make sure I understand that in the next couple of weeks (post-chemo) I should expect mouth pain, skin issues (you know, rashes, etc), a lot of fatigue, some bone aching when your graft comes in, neutropenic fevers, possible re-admisson for infections, etc, etc. That's all understood I told them, but I'm going to enjoy today being my last day of chemo, and I'll pile on the rest of that stuff when it comes. At that point they just smile at me and tell me how well I'm doing.

I took a nice shower this morning, went on a walk and got a visit from Steve (Bronson - he's a nurse here on the 5th floor). Another day with an excellent nurse - Duane. I am very impressed by their skill level and knowledge. I actually ate some oatmeal and 1/2 yogurt, so that's a good sign. Now I just started my Melpholen (next to last chemo). This is a real culprit in the mouth sore department in the next week or so. It's interesting because while you're getting this infusion, they have you eat ice, popsicles, and italian ice for 1/2 hour prior and 4 hours afterward. Why you do this is pretty cool. Studies have showed that while you're taking Melpholen, if you constrict the blood flow in the mouth by eating cold items constantly, not as much of the drug gets to the oral mucosa due lack of blood flow. With the result being, less painful mouth sore problems since not as much of the chemo gets to your mouth. Pretty cool if it works, I'm all for less mouth pain with this experience. I'll keep you posted on how well it worked.

Next up today is my LAST chemo. Unfortunately, it feels like the monster under your bed. You know, the one you were really, really afraid of when you were 5 years old. I think my problem is that I've actually seen this monster. As you can probably tell, my last dose of ATG is following the Melpholen. The only thing I'm feeling good about is that I'm fighting with my eyes wide open on what this monster looks like, it won't surprise me this time. By knowing that, I feel like I've got the upper hand. So, I accept that it's gonna suck for 6 hours, but that I will win another round with Mr. ATG.

And, tomorrow is Day 0. This is a big day around here. It's the day you get your stem-cells back. People who are battling Leukemia, multiple myeloma, and lymphoma, you know truly aweful diseases, call this their "second birthday." I'm not sure I've really earned the right to claim it as my 2nd birthday as people who have battled these aweful cancers, but it is still exciting to be getting your stem-cells back. From what they tell me, it's totally anticlimactic, takes about 30 mins and you smell like garlic for 2 days (due to the DMSO that it's stored in). So, whether I consider it a 2nd birthday or not, there's no quesion there will be a big party (as Casey mentioned, thanks pumpkin) next year on this day - Sat, Dec 18th, 2010. Stay tuned.

Ok, let me step outside the hospital for a minute. That's enough about me for today. I just want to throw the best holiday wishes out there to everybody. I hope all is going well for you and your families during these very busy days. Just remember to not worry about missing a gift for someone, but be more concerned about missing a visit or a smile. It's all about perspective. I've often told Casey that I think we should go a year with Christmas where gifts are only given to children under 15. The over-15 crowd should, just once, try a Christmas full of cards, phone calls, get togethers, dinners, gift-certificates for 'time' (like dinner and a movie), long walks, setting up 30 minutes drop-bys for some chat and a drink, and so many other ideas that would fulfill a less material christmas. And, when gifts are given, think of giving the gift of time. For example: I would get my mom a gift cert for a cooking class that I would do with her. I would get Paul Mariners tickets with dinner and beers at the Pyramid brewery. I would get Casey a 'couples' spa day and lunch while the kids were with a babysitter. I would get Carol passes to a movie (for us) and I'd buy the popcorn. These gifts of time are amazing. Casey and I have tried to do more of these the last few years, and it's been great. That being said, I think all kids should still get fun and exciting gifts, so I'm not dissing the kids here.

Well, 30 mins till ATG, so I better hit the bathroom and get in bed. YeeeeHawwww. Love to all and I look forward to talking with you soon. Mike